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Vickie Manfredi’s Testimony.
              Intercessor for GWTW

I was 26 yrs.  old, living in Spokane, Washington.  My husband was an Air Force pilot flying missions in Viet Nam.  I was depressed, something I had had to live with since my early teens.  I had tried to take my life several times and even spent time in a psychiatric hospital for a month.    As a child, I was raised Catholic and tried to love God and to find Him.   I always knew He wanted me for something, and I was haunted by this knowing and my inability to find Him.  

The church's teaching to children in the late forties or so was to present God as a punishing Father who knew everything you thought and did.  You did not escape punishment except by confessing sins to the priest who represented God on earth.  My early years were plagued with nightmares in which the world was coming to an end by earthquakes and floods.  I would awake screaming because I could not find the priest to tell him my sins so I could see God.  I became afraid to leave church after my confession because I was afraid I would sin.   I feared hell; and in my young innocent life, I began living in a hell of fear. 

My teenage years were fraught with rebellion, anger and rage.   This anger I directed at God because my parents were also abusive.  My mother, who was an alcoholic, took out her frustrations by beating me up as the rage came over her.  I felt God hated me.  All the messages I got said so.  He was going to punish me in the after-life and in this one.  When I was sixteen, I became so full of rage at my rejection that I took a baseball bat to church and climbed up on the altar and began smashing the statues and screaming at God that I hated Him too.  That is when I spent time in a psychiatric hospital.   I learned after that to hide my feelings and buried them so as not to ever go there again. 

At age 26, I found myself going into a depression.  I was alone with a little child, and my husband was gone.   I was inadequate for the role I had to play.  It was here that I was forced to get psychiatric help.  I spent four long years in therapy finding out who I was and exploring anger.  My therapy ended, and I felt new and whole.  BUT, still the knowing that God wanted my life made me afraid to go to Him.  He was still the same dangerous God of my youth and therapy had not changed that. 

My marriage began to fail; and at that point, two neighbors (Spirit-filled) invited me to attend a prayer meeting at Gonzaga University.  It was there at that meeting that I heard a rich strong voice speak out prophetically over the gathering.   Why, everybody stopped talking and praying as He talked as though he were speaking for God! For the first time in my life I was perfectly still and hearing.   The man speaking was John Sandford.  I attended a few more of those meetings; and at the end of the third one, my friends were leading me forward to be prayed for.   I had little understanding still.  I was too timid to refuse to go.  Then, I was seated and those around me began to pray some in funny languages.  They told me to pray too, so I prayed the Hail Mary prayer of my childhood, the only prayer I could remember.   I wanted to run out and go home.  

Lying in bed at home later that night, I began to sense something strange happening to me.   I closed my eyes, wondering if I were dying.  Then, my hand shot out straight on the bed.  My palm felt hot like it was pierced.  I could not move it.  Then, I heard a voice from within but not my own say, “Do you believe I died for your sins?" I knew in an instant that voice was Jesus - the Jesus I thought was a fairy tale story.  He was talking to me! I answered, "Yes, I believe." Then, another question, "Do you believe I love you?” "Yes, I believe" was my answer, then darkness, the dreadful fear of childhood, blackness forever without end.  No one to hear you, love you or comfort you.  In the distance, I began to hear singing, a chorus of angelic beings singing about God and praising Him.  I floated out of the darkness into a brilliant light.  I waked up and sat straight up in bed.  I knew I was different and had encountered God.  I knew Jesus was real and loved me, and I knew my life had changed forever.  I ran to my friends’ house the next morning and just at the sight of me they began to cry, and I began to cry.  I was no longer lost.  Vickie had found her life and then found her LIFE.

I received prayer from John Sandford once more and this time the Lord delivered my life out of Satan's hands once and for all.  I did not know the jargon of deliverance and was not prepared for it.  But delivered I was.  And at that time, John prophesied over my life.  He saw an open window in heaven by which God would bless me and lead me forth into a ministry.  He didn't say it to me, but today I know that a piece of his mantle of healing fell on me.  God placed in my heart a desire to free others as He had freed me.  I began to read the Bible and other books about healing.  I read Agnes Sandford's books on healing, and then we moved to Dallas, Texas.  Agnes Sandford came to teach there in the late ‘60’s.  When she laid hands on me, I fell to the floor with such a thud that I shook the floor.  She looked at me straight in the eyes and said to me, "You have it, don't you?” I knew what she meant.

This new baby Christian was loosed in Texas.  I found a church to attend and began praying for people every chance I had.  I prayed the model of prayer that had been prayed over me.  Women began to come to my home for special prayer for healing.  BUT, soon the church restrained me and the others from praying such prayers.  All praying had to be cleared by the priest.  Because I did not stop my praying, I was addressed publicly during a church service along with a few others.  I was a new Christian and not disciplined and unaware of protocol, etc.  My fire would soon go out as I was likened to the devil.  I left the church broken and ashamed.  Jesus told me to write out my pain to Him and that He would answer me.  So, I wrote letters to Him, telling Him all my feelings and expressing anger towards Him.  He answered me back by my own hand.  He knew how to raise a daughter without help from anyone.  I would write and He would answer me.

I met Barbara Collins during this time.  I attended a Bible study she taught.  I wanted to get inside her brain and figure out where she got the words she taught us.  How could she make this Word come alive? There were times when my heart would start thumping so loud I thought others could hear it.  I wanted to shout out, "I get it! I hear what you're saying and understand what He is telling me!" At times I provoked the group, but never her.  I knew there was a similarity in the voice God had spoken to me and the way she taught His Word.  I was healing from my wounds.  Jesus loved me just as He had said.  I was not condemned.

I left Texas for Connecticut in the early ‘70’s and on fire again.  The group sent me off with a prayer covering and an inscription in the Bible given to me that I memorized.  BUT - Connecticut was not ready for the radical prayers I began to pray over others.  Again, the backlash of rejection and those terribly condemning words about the devil were hurled at me.  I retreated and hid my light.  A friend had come with me to Connecticut.  She also was of the same Spirit, and we had each other for comfort.  We prayed together but left the church. 

I wrote stories again to the Lord and comforted myself, using a special language only the Lord knew.  He spoke back to me in visions and dreams.  I wrote to John Sandford for many years, and he always answered.  He and Paula prayed me through many years and are today my spiritual parents.  It was not until many years had passed that I found and joined a Christian Vineyard Fellowship church in the next town.  I slowly became a part of it, and then became a leader.  I began to notice women who for one reason or another were always on the fringe - on the outside looking in.  The Lord put a special love in my heart for them, and I invited them to my home for fellowship and prayer.

The first two who came are sisters who suffer from mental illnesses.  After many years, they still come to my home on Fridays.  Both have been slowly healed and have taken on their own ministries.  Others also came, and some brought friends from other churches.  The Lord led me to others to invite.  The group grows and then divides, others taking on their own groups.  We grow and divide.  Some just come for a while and leave.  The Lord continues to meet us here on Fridays as we worship Him.  He has taught us how to minister to one another.  We have laughed and cried, and we know each other intimately.  We have been sharpened against one another.  We drop our denominations at the door and pick up the standard of the Holy Spirit and move forward by God's grace.  Our baby steps are seen and blessed.

The Lord has opened another door for me to minister to elderly women who attend a day care center in the building where I work.  I have been invited to lead them in worship and ministry.  They are beautiful and ready for their Lord and the Lord has not left them without.  They lift up their small arthritic hands and praise Him with me.  They are learning to pray for each other.  They have begun to light a candle when I come and to take charge in their own way.  One sings out with a voice that brings us all to tears.  They are finding they can still minister to each other.

By God's doing, I have found my teacher Barbara after many years.  I am older yet still feel like a child when I write to her.  She still provokes me to latch on to the Lord and challenges me in new ways that tell me that I must be ready for revival as my Father God sees it and brings it.  Some of my old ways of relating to Him are being transformed.  I must be accountable for the ways in which I relate His words.  I love His intimacy, but He is looking for maturity and is moving me out of childlike patterns.  I find myself wanting to be in prayer all the time.  Some times I accidentally talk in the Spirit to people, forgetting I am in the world.  Most of the time, they do not notice; and I laugh at myself.  I know father God smiles, too.

I am honored and humbled to pray for you all, to join forces with you and join your sisterhood to ours and mine.  I am proud to walk alongside of you as we pray in the kingdom of our God here on earth.  My heart is overwhelmed with joy at the thought of our oneness and unity; something only He can do.  Do you see Him standing in Heaven, our Jesus, as we come home hand-in-hand and shoulder-to-shoulder without a break in our ranks? Oh, how He is applauding, His heart full because we are His and He is ours!

Your sister, Vickie Manfredi



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